


Breathe You In

by toastyspongecake



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Adultery, Angst, Cheating, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Infidelity, Love, Sad, True Love, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2017-06-23
Packaged: 2018-08-07 08:57:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7708870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toastyspongecake/pseuds/toastyspongecake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What started out as innocent flirting has turned into a secret love affair between you and Arin. Now immensely in love, the two of you are forced to make one of the hardest decisions of your lives, one that could change the fate of Game Grumps forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wanting

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhh I've had this vague story idea in my head for weeks now. This is definitely a work in progress. Please let me know where you would like a story like this to go!

_“Do you love me?”_  

_“Yes.”_

_“Do you want to be with me?”_

_“Of course I do.”_

_“But...y-you want to be with her too.”_

_“I...I just don’t know anymore.”_

“Are you listening? Helloooo? Hey!” 

I jerked my head up from its resting place on my balled up fists, looking around to find the voice that startled me. Everyone in the room had all eyes on me and I began to feel the slightest tinge of embarrassment settling in as I tried to bring myself back to reality.

“Daydreaming during collaboration meetings again?” Suzy’s voice spoke at me from across the table.

“No, sorry I-”

“C’mon,” Arin cut me off with a chuckle.  “I didn’t think our meetings were _that_ boring.”

My gaze connected with Arin’s and he smiled warmly at me, but I could see the concern he was trying so hard to hide. Quickly, I averted my gaze and immediately felt my face becoming hot. It’s bad enough to be caught daydreaming during our weekly meetings. It’s even worse when Arin tries to cover it up with a bad joke.

“Speak for yourself, man.” Dan said as he leaned back in his chair. “Do you know all of the super great things I could be doing right now instead of this? Go to the dentist, read the Bible, stare directly into the Sun, the list goes on.”

“This meeting is running a little long.” Ross interjected, looking up at the clock. “And I’m supposed to meet Holly for dinner in about 20 minutes.”

“All right, fine.” Arin said in annoyance. “We’ll pick back up on this next week. I’m getting kinda tired of hearing myself talk, anyway.”

Dan and Ross quickly fled the table, stopping by their desks to grab their belongings before shouting a hurried ‘goodbye’ and slamming the door to the office behind them. Barry stood, stretching his arms out over his head and yawning. “I think I’m going to head on home too.”

“See ya later, man.” Arin said.

Kevin got up and headed over to his desk. “I’ve got some editing to finish up, but it shouldn’t take me too much longer.” He sat down and put on his headphones before getting to work.

“Ughhh.” Suzy groaned. “I still have to record some stuff for my channel. I’ve been putting it off all day.”

“It’s nearly 7:00, Suze. Can’t you just record it in the morning?” I asked.

“I need to have at least one video edited and posted by tomorrow afternoon, so I don’t really think I have much of a choice but to record tonight.” Suzy stood up and walked around the table to Arin. “Plus, Arin can’t sleep while I’m recording in the next room, and he _haaaates_ being woken up in the mornings. Right, babe?” She leaned over from behind Arin, wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

He looked to his side and smiled at her. “Why don’t you go on home and record? I’m gonna stay here for a bit and just do some inventory. I’ll be home soon.”

I awkwardly fumbled with my pen. “ _Inventory..._ ”

“All righty. I’ll see you at home then.” Suzy pulled away from Arin and sauntered towards her desk to grab her bag. She swung it gracefully over her right shoulder, then reached into the front pocket to find her keys. “Ah-ha! Here they are!” Adeptly, she twirled the key ring around her dainty, pale fingers and headed towards the door. “See you tomorrow!” And with a quick wave, she shut the door behind her.

Arin waited until he heard the familiar sound of Suzy’s car pulling away from the studio. Only then did he look up at me.

“There’s something I need to take care of in the Grump room.” For a split second, his eyes shot over to Kevin, still working diligently at his computer. “I probably could use your help.”

“Inventory?” I asked, still twiddling my pen between my fingers.

Arin’s mouth curved up into a half-smirk. “Something like that.”

I stood calmly and followed Arin across the office to what was officially referred to as the Grump room- the recording studio where Arin and Dan recorded every single episode of Game Grumps. As we approached the room, Arin opened the door, standing to the side of it.

“After you.” He hilariously bowed as he held the door for me, and I couldn’t help but giggle as I walked past.

The room always had a strange artificial smell, most likely due to the ridiculous amount of electronic equipment that we use to film the show, and it was always hot. However, if you sit on the couch, you can smell the lingering and combined scents of Arin and Dan’s cologne, which is actually quite comforting. I walked over to the couch and sat down on Arin’s side, taking a deep breath in through my nose. Immediately, I felt relaxed.

But that feeling faded fast when Arin sat down on the couch in front of me, and was replaced by nervous tension.

“Are you okay?” He asked me, his voice low. 

“Of course.” I replied, trying my best to smile at him. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You were so out of it during the meeting today. It really worried me.” His fingers lingered over my own, which were gripping the edge of the couch tighter than I realized. 

“I guess I just didn’t get enough sleep last night.”

He laughed softly under his breath. “You and me both.”

“So…” My grip on the couch tightened even more, turning my knuckles white. “...you couldn’t stop thinking about it either?” I spoke so softly, I almost thought he wouldn’t hear me.

Arin placed his hand over mine, and my fingers relaxed. “I haven’t stopped thinking about it.”

I looked up at him, and flashbacks from the night before poured into my mind. The words we spoke. The feelings we shared. The touches we gave. The questions left unanswered. My mind boggled with so many questions left unanswered. 

I suppose Arin could tell what I was thinking. In that next moment, he reached forward and grabbed the sides of my arms, pulling me into his chest. His strong arms wrapped around me tightly, and he rested his head on top of mine. Instinctively, I nestled my face into the crook of his neck. The intense smell of him immediately soothed me. The fingers that once gripped the edges of the couch too tightly now laid delicately across his back, holding him to me.

“I want you so bad.” He whispered lovingly into my ear, sending shivers throughout my entire being.

“I’m right here.” I whispered back to him. “You can have me.”

He leaned back into the couch, pulling me with him to lay on his chest. His fingers stroked my hair softly, his lips pressed against my forehead. I closed my eyes and breathed him in. Neither of us spoke for what seemed like an eternity. We just stayed like this, drinking in each other’s touch. 

The sound of Kevin leaving the office is what finally brought us back down to reality.

“I think…” Arin spoke hesitantly. “I think I’m going to leave Suzy.”

My stomach lurched into my throat. “Arin-”

“Listen to me.” He pulled us both up into a sitting position, facing each other. “I know it sounds crazy. To be honest, I haven’t got the slightest fucking clue what will happen to us-and I mean all of us- when it happens. But I am willing to take that chance if it means that I can be happy with you.”

Tears pricked at my eyes, threatening to spill over my hot cheeks. I opened my mouth to speak, but the words I needed to say to him totally escaped my mind. I felt elated and numb all at the same time.

Arin placed his hands on either side of my face. “I know this isn’t going to be easy for anybody. A lot of people are going to get hurt. And Suzy…oh god, Suzy…” He faltered and that’s when the tears came, spilling over his cheeks. Both of his hands flew to his face and a deep sob racked in his chest. I threw my arms around him, holding him as close and as tight as I could to me. He gripped the fabric of my shirt so tightly I felt it might rip. And just like this, we cried together.

We cried for Suzy, whose entire life would soon be crumbling to pieces underneath her. We cried for Dan, Barry, Ross, and Kevin, who would be unfortunately caught in the middle of the drama to ensue. We cried for Game Grumps, which may or may not be able to survive this, as much as we hated to admit. We cried because we knew that nothing would ever be the same.

And I cried for Arin, because I knew he was about to lose his best friend.  


	2. Desire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH MY GOD AN UPDATE AFTER ALMOST AN ENTIRE YEAR. 
> 
> So explanation as to why it took me so long to update: Right after I completed the first chapter of this story, I got a job! Like a REAL job where I work 40+ hours a week. It took over my life and I wasn't able to focus on writing. But now, I'm finally on vacation! Thus, the next chapter of this story has FINALLY been completed.
> 
> No promises for when the next chapter will be up....but I will try my best. 
> 
> ENJOY!!!

_Bzz Bzz_

My phone’s vibrations buzzed loudly against the surface of my bedside table. I groaned and rolled over, throwing my hand out just far enough to reach it. Holding the phone over my face, I turned it on to check my notifications. One message from Arin. I glanced at the time.

_“6:30?! Arin’s never awake this early. He must not have been able to sleep again…”_

I slid my finger across the screen to open the message.

**-Hey. You up?**

I couldn’t help the smile that wanted so badly to creep onto my face, and I wasted no time in responding.

_-I am now._

Almost immediately, my phone buzzed again.

**-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up. Go back to bed.**

_-It’s okay. Can’t sleep?_

**-No. Too much on my mind.**

_-Tell me about it._

**-I can’t sleep next to Suzy anymore. I just can’t do it.**

_-Have you tried sleeping in the guest room?_

**-I want to sleep next to you.**

My heart pounded in my chest. Arin has said things like this to me before. But every time he says them is like the first time I’m hearing them. Butterflies, every time.

_-You will. Soon._

**-I think I’ll just head down to the office a little earlier today. Sleep just isn’t going to happen for me right now.**

_-Well now that I’m up, I might as well do the same. See you soon?_

**-See you soon.**

I flung the covers off of me, swinging my legs out over the side of the bed. Looking into the mirror above my dresser, I realized I looked like I’d been hit by a truck. My hair was tangled and stuck to the side of my face. Underneath my eyes hung deep, dark circles, and my face almost looked sunken. _“Guess I didn’t rest easy last night either…”_

I quickly dug through my dresser looking for something quick and easy to throw on. I decided on a pair of black leggings and continued to rummage for a t-shirt. A crumpled up shirt shoved into the back of the drawer caught my eye and I pulled it out. It was Arin’s classic grey Grump Head shirt that he had left a few weeks ago. I slipped the shirt over my head and became enveloped in his sweet scent. The shirt was oversized on my body, but did cover my...assets. Nodding, I reached for the bottle of perfume on my dresser and gave myself a few sprits to mask Arin’s scent.

My hair was such a mess, but it was nothing a brush and a hair tie couldn’t fix. I carefully brushed out the tangles and formed a neat bun on the top of my head, tying it off with a hair tie and securing it with bobby pins. Next, fixing my face. I laid my face with a thin layer of foundation, went in under my eyes with some concealer, and brightened myself up with a pinch of blush and a few swipes of mascara.

“Eh, it’s not the worst I’ve ever looked.” I said to myself, standing away from the mirror to admire my work.

I threw on some black flip flops, grabbed my keys, and headed out the door. Once in my car, I checked my phone. 7:08. Nobody else will be at the office this early. Just me and Arin. I smiled and put the car in drive.

7:22. I pull my car into the lot by the office and park. Arin’s car was parked a few spaces down. I looked around the rest of the lot. Just as expected, nobody else was here. I checked myself in the visor mirror before exiting and locking my car. Almost hesitantly, I walked up to the door of the office, knowing Arin was waiting for me. My heart beat so hard against the walls of my chest, I felt it might burst. Taking a deep breath, I stuck my key into the office door and opened it, then cautiously walked inside.

Arin was sitting at his desk staring intently at his computer screen. One hand sat on top of the mouse, the other clung to the edge of the desk, fingers furiously drumming against the hard surface. His face held a scowl and he looked exhausted. When the door to the office shut, he looked up at me, and the scowl fell from his face. Instead, a soft grin appeared, although his eyes stayed tired and almost...concerned.

“I’m not sure I’ve ever been here this early.” I spoke first, mostly to break the silence.

Arin laughed lightly. “Oh, I have. Many times. When there’s deadlines, the work has to get done somehow.”

I tossed my keys onto my desk and slumped into my office chair with a heavy sigh. “Turns out I didn’t sleep very well last night either. Found that out this morning when I looked into the mirror. It was scary.”

“I find that very hard to believe.” Arin said with a chuckle, standing from his seat and walking over to me. “I’m positive that you looked absolutely radiant, just like you always do.” He leaned down to my eye level and planted a soft kiss on my forehead, sending lightning bolts down my spine. His lips lingered for just a moment before he pulled away and leaned back against the edge of my desk.

It was quiet for a moment, until my growling stomach broke the silence.

“I guess you can tell I didn’t stop to get breakfast on my way here.” I mumbled embarrassingly.

“We’ve got tons of stuff here. How about some cereal?” Arin walked over to the tall shelf that stood in what was technically our kitchen space in the office. An open area with a single countertop, sink, fridge, and a farmhouse style wooden table. We used this area more for meetings and filming stupid vlogs than actual eating, but it’s nice to know it was good for something.

“Let’s see. We’ve got Frosted Flakes, Cap’n Crunch, Raisin Bran, and...Uncle Tobys Oats?” Arin and I both looked at each other in confusion until it finally dawned on us.

“Ross.” We both said in conjunction. Leave it to Ross to ship in his weird Australian cereals.

I walked over to the shelf and pulled down the box of Cap’n Crunch. “Nothing like a big bowl of glass to get your morning started!”

Arin couldn’t help but laugh. “That stuff DOES fuck up the roof of your mouth when you eat it.”

“But it’s sooooo good!” I poured the cereal into a bowl on the counter and grabbed the milk out of the fridge, splashing in just a little bit over the top of the cereal. After finding a spoon in the drawer by the sink, I dug in.

Arin watched me closely as I ate my breakfast, and I began to feel a little uncomfortable. “Um...you know, you really shouldn’t stare at people while they eat.”

He shook his head. “Sorry. I didn’t even realize I was staring. I guess I can’t help it.” Arin moved closer towards me. “You’re just so cute.”

“Right now, I have a mouth full of soggy cereal. Nothing very cute about that.” I said as I spooned heaping globs of cereal into my mouth.

“I think you’re adorable all the time.” He reached up and glided his fingers along the side of my face, sliding a few stray strands of hair behind my ear. His hand gently cupped my cheek and neck. “Especially right now.”

I placed the cereal bowl back down on the counter. With my hands now free, I placed one on top of Arin’s hand, while the other mindlessly played with his hair. Arin moved his other hand to my hip, pulling me just slighly closer to him. He leaned down and pressed his forehead against mine. Our eyes closed, and I could feel his hot breath against my face. The tension around us grew tighter. His fingers became agitated, gripping the t-shirt that fell around my waist, while mine tangled further into his hair. Our breathing picked up slightly and I couldn’t help but focus on the desire that bubbled between my legs.

“I’m sorry…” Arin breathed, just barely audible. “But like I said, I just can’t help myself.”

In the very next moment, Arin furiously pressed his lips against mine. He kissed me so hard and with so much feeling, I felt I might faint. My knees became weak, and I think Arin sensed that, because he picked me up with ease and placed me on the edge of the counter. Instinctively, I wrapped my legs around Arin’s waist, bringing him as close to me as I possibly could. Our lips crashed against each other again and again, tongues colliding and dancing and tasting every inch of the other’s mouth. My fingers gripped Arin’s shoulders, digging my nails into the soft fabric of his shirt. Arin’s hands traveled up the back of mine, exploring my skin until he could take it no longer. He pulled away from me just for a moment and lifted the t-shirt up and over my head, tossing it onto the floor beside us. His lips returned to sit upon my neck, and he trailed kisses down my neck and exposed chest.

My nails clawed at the back of his shirt, begging it to be removed and expose the skin that I so dearly craved. Arin reached back with his own hand, and pulled the back of the shirt over his head. It, too, joined mine on the floor. I wrapped my arms around his neck, bringing him close to me and pressing myself against him. A sigh of relief escaped my lips as our skin touched. Arin slid his hands underneath my thighs and lifted me from the counter. His lips never left mine as he carried me to the end of the farmhouse table and laid me down across the top. He kissed me ferociously, his hands running all up and down every crevice of my body, before reaching down to tease the band of my leggings.

His fingers barely slipped beneath them when a loud crash startled us back to reality.

My heart sank. Standing by the door next to a broken coffee cup, was Suzy. The hot coffee pooled around his feet as she stood there staring at us, eyes wide and mouth gaping. Arin and I had been so engulfed in each other that we didn’t hear Suzy’s car pull up to the office.

We all stared at each other without moving for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, I jumped off the table and grabbed my shirt, fleeing to the bathroom. As I closed and locked the bathroom door, I could hear Arin pleading and the door to the office slamming shut. I pressed my back against the bathroom door and slid down until I sat on the floor, hugging my knees. I closed my eyes and tears began to silently trickle down my cheeks.

In the distance, I could hear the sounds of a car door slamming and tires squealing against the pavement as Suzy drove away.


	3. Knowing

“Please come out…”

I listened to Arin’s muffled begging through the solid bathroom door. I don’t know how long I’d been in the bathroom. 20 minutes...30...maybe an hour. I lost track of time the second I heard Suzy’s coffee cup hit the floor.

“Suzy’s gone. It’s okay. I want...I _need_ to see you. Please…” Arin’s forehead banged gently against the door as he spoke.  

“It’s not okay.” I sniffled. “Everything is fucked.”

Arin exhaled slowly. “You’re right. Everything is fucked. But what else could we have expected?”

Arin’s right. Was I expecting Suzy to calmly listen to Arin and I explain ourselves? Suzy reacted like any other person would react after seeing the love of their life with somebody else…

I stood up and went over to the mirror. So much for trying to fix my face. Any makeup that I had applied this morning was long gone, and the dark circles were back. My eyes were bloodshot and puffy from crying and my cheeks were flushed. I splashed some cool water on my face, dried off, and opened the door.

Arin stood directly in the doorway, leaning against the frame. His eyes were red and puffy too. I glanced at him only for a moment before lowering my head. 

“I just...I just didn’t want her to find out like this.” I whispered. 

“I know.” There was pain in Arin’s voice. “Me either.”

Almost subconsciously, my arms reached out and wrapped themselves around Arin’s torso. My head buried itself into his warm chest. His arms surrounded me and held me close to him, his cheek pressed against the top of my head protectively. We stayed like this, in each other’s embrace, for a long time. 

Arin finally broke the silence. “It’s over.”

My heart skipped a thousand beats. I felt sick. Terrified. I looked up at Arin with pure fear in my eyes. “W-what?” I asked, my voice shaking. 

Arin’s eyes connected with mine and only then had he realized what he said. “Oh god. No! No, sweetheart, that’s not what I meant.” He quickly caressed my face with both of his hands and kissed my forehead. “The hardest part is over. Suzy knows. Now it’s just me and you.” 

I pushed back away from Arin so I could really look at him. “Is it? I mean, was that really the hardest part? What about work? What about Game Grumps?”

Arin ran a hand through his hair. “I...I don’t know. We’ll take a break until we figure it all out. There’s enough backlogged footage to keep putting out episodes for a couple of weeks.” 

“And Suzy? Suzy works here too. What’s going to happen to Suzy?” My voice cracked and I could feel my eyes welling up again.

Arin averted his gaze to the floor. “I don’t know.” 

I pushed past Arin and walked to the farmhouse table, swinging my legs over the bench and banging my fists on the table’s surface. “Dammit!”

At the exact same moment, the office door swung open, startling Arin enough to make him jump. 

“Dude, what the FUCK?!” Dan’s familiar voice bounced against the walls of the office. 

“Oh god.” I grumbled and buried my face in my hands. 

Dan marches over to the table and takes a seat. He folds his hands in front of him. “So who’s going to tell me what the fuck is going on?” I could feel his eyes darting between Arin and myself. 

Arin sits down quietly beside me. “What do you want to know?” 

“I want to know why Suzy called me in hysterics at 7:30 this morning, screaming something about you and…” Dan’s voice faltered and I knew his eyes were directly on me. 

“Suzy saw us together.” Arin didn't hesitate to answer him. 

“ _ Together _ ? Like, kissing? Or were you fucking on the table?” 

“Somewhere between the two.”

Dan dropped his head and gripped a handful of hair in a balled up fist. “Fuck, man…” 

Arin sighed defeatedly. “Yeah…”

“I mean, how long has this been going on?” Dan asked. 

“8 months.” I said, lifting my head from my hands and looking at Dan apologetically. “It's my fault. I fell in love with him. I shouldn't have acted upon my feelings knowing he was married, but…” No. No excuses. “...it's my fault.”

From under the table, Arin placed a hand on my thigh. “I’m just as responsible. I fell in love with her too.” His hand squeezed my thigh gently. 

Dan rubbed his eyes with his fingers. “This is insane. I cannot believe this is happening.” 

“Neither can we…” Arin mumbled. 

“So,” Dan began, dropping his hands to the table with a loud slap. “what now?”

“That's what we’re trying to figure out. I hate to say it, but Game Grumps is probably gonna have to take a break.” Arin’s voice was riddled with guilt. 

Dan sighed. “I was afraid you were gonna say that. But unfortunately I don't see many other options here. You two plan on staying together, yes?”

We both nodded. 

“Then there's no way Suzy is coming back here.” 

Tears pricked at my eyes and I laid my head down on the table. “How can I ever face Suzy again…” I groaned.

Arin looked at Dan in concern. “Where is Suzy?”

“I told her she could go to my place.” Dan said. “She can stay there if she wants. I can’t imagine she’d want to be at home with you right now.”

I raised my head and looked at Arin. “I don’t want Suzy to feel like she’s been kicked out of her own house. Why don’t you stay with me and Suzy can go home?”

“Uh, if I could just interject here,” Dan raised a finger. “I honestly doubt she wants to even be at her own home right now. You know, the home that her and Arin are supposed to share.  _ Together _ .”

Arin leaned his head into his hands, fingers gripping at the hair that fell along his hairline. Seeing Arin like this made me sick. I looked at Dan, pleading for an answer that would solve all of this. He shook his head.

“You’ve got me in a tight position here. I want to help you both because you’re my friends. Arin, you’re my  _ best friend _ . But Suzy...she’s my friend too. I hate to see all of you like this.” Dan reached into his pocket and took out his phone. 

“What are you doing?” Arin asked.

The slightest smirk pricked the corners of Dan’s mouth. “Calling a friend.”

He raised the phone to his ear and waited patiently as it dialed, his fingers drumming against the surface of the table. When the receiver answered the call, his fingers stopped.

“Hey! We have a...situation down here at the office. How fast can you get down here?" 

Arin and I exchanged a look of worry. 

“Perfect. We’ll fill you in when you get here. See you soon.” Dan hung up the phone and placed it back into his pocket. He folded his hands back together and smiled at both Arin and I.

“Who the hell was that?” Arin seemed frustrated. 

“Brian.” Dan answered confidently. “This fucked up shitshow calls for a doctor.”

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
